write-in candidate

[annafugazzi]

OK, I told myself I would not get political on this lj, and I lied. ::hangs head in shame::

In honour of the Canadian Prime Ministerial and American Vice Presidential debates this week, here's who I'm voting for this election: Trevor Strong, the Arrogant Worms Party candidate. Or possibly Chris Patterson of the Worms, I don't know their voices well enough to tell which is which. Whichever one it is, personally I don't see how we could go wrong with his political platform:

IF I WERE PRIME MINISTER
lf I were Prime Minister, I’d transform the land
All things would be glorious under my firm strong hand
I’d enlarge Prince Edward Island, and shrink the tax on booze
If l were Prime Minister, the Leafs would never lose

If I were were Prime Minister, French and English would be gone
There’d be no more Two Solitudes, 'cause we’d all speak Klingon
And I’d give my buddies jobs they weren't qualified for--
Wait, I’m so sorry, I think that’s been done before

If I were Prime Minister, Canadians would tan
In the Gulf of Mexico, where I’d move Newfoundland

If l were Prime Minister, I would use my power
To finally make the doughnut our official flower
And I'd make it illegal to sit and bitch and whine
Though that might leave Canadians with too much spare time

And I would be Prime Minister, if only for one flaw
I don’t think that I could ever live in Ottawa

If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister
If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister
If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister
If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister

I’d bathe in Maple Syrup and I’d have a talking moose
And Mounties would massage me, to keep me nice and loose
I'd get rid of the Queen, replace her with my cat
Appointment to the Senate would be trial by combat

I'd solve all the problems of this country's apparatus
By granting every person nation status!
I'd encourage global warming, move the jetstream further north
And I'd ban all politicians, except for me of course!

If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister
If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister

I'd be super great!
And you'd all love me!
You'd have to!
'Cause I'd make it the law!

If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister
If I were, if I were, if I were Prime Minister!

http://www.4shared.com/file/62546396/bacb5251/If_I_Were_Prime_Minister.html (recording starts with banter re. upcoming election)

Comments

[aome.livejournal.com]

Hee - it sounds like something Shel Silverstein would write. :D

[annafugazzi.livejournal.com]

LOL! yeah, it does, doesn't it? Heee :D :D