Home schooling fun
Apr. 8th, 2008 03:11 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
annafugazziGod help me, I just used Harry Potter to explain adultery and illegitimacy to an eight-year-old.
::shaking head at self::
Edit: OK, so that was completely obscure. It all started when we were listening to an Irish drinking song, Johnny Be Fair. Much adultery occurs in the song.
Well Johnny be fair and Johnny be fine and wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Johnny but me father up and said:
"I'm sorry to tell you daughter what your mother never knew,
But Johnny is a son of mine and so he's kin to you."
Then Jimmy be fair and Jimmy be fine and wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Jimmy but me father up and said:
"I'm sorry to tell you daughter what your mother never knew,
But Jimmy too is a son of mine, and so he's kin to you."
Then Danny be fair and Danny be fine and wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Danny but me father up and said:
"I'm sorry to tell you daughter what your mother never knew,
But Danny too is a son of mine, and so he's kin to you."
Oh never was there a girl so sad and sorry as I was;
The boys in town are all me kin, and me father is the cause.
If I should thus continue, I shall die a single miss.
I think I'll go to Mother and complain to her of this.
"Oh daughter haven't I taught you to forgive and to forget?
And if your father sowed his oats, still you need not fret.
Your father may be the cause of all the boys in town but still....
He's not the one who sired you, so marry who you will!"
Elder child got it. Younger child did not. After much explaining, younger child did not understand why the girl wasn't related to the boys in town. So eventually, I asked them to name two male and four female characters (we'd already tried with "Dad" and "Mom" and "Other Woman #1" etc.) from books.
They named Harry, Ginny, Seamus, Hermione, Romilda, and Pansy.
We ended up with the following family tree:
Ginny
+ ========= Cindy (narrator)
Harry
+ ========= Johnny (and Ron probably a little miffed at them)
Hermione
(Harry)
+ ========= Jimmy (and a lot of chocolate cauldrons)
Romilda
(Harry)
+ ========= Danny (Harry was doing drugs here)
Pansy
So he was able to see why Harry thought she was related to all these boys.
Then we changed it for the last verse, ending up with
Seamus
+ ========== Cindy (Dean's gonna blow a gasket when he finds out about this)
Ginny
Harry
+ ========= Johnny
Hermione
(Harry)
+ ========= Jimmy
Romilda
(Harry)
+ ========= Danny
Pansy
And he got it!
It was a rather surreal conversation, though. Especially when he wanted to know how people could have children and not know that they had them, or not know that they had been cheated on when their spouse had kids with/by somebody else.
Elder child: Well they have to have sex to have kids.
Younger child: Yeah.
Me: You normally don't do that in public.
Elder child: It's not like Harry goes to Ginny, "OK, see you later, I'm off to have sex with Hermione!" and she says, "No problem, I'll just go have sex with Seamus!"
Me: ::stifles giggles::
::shaking head at self::
Edit: OK, so that was completely obscure. It all started when we were listening to an Irish drinking song, Johnny Be Fair. Much adultery occurs in the song.
Well Johnny be fair and Johnny be fine and wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Johnny but me father up and said:
"I'm sorry to tell you daughter what your mother never knew,
But Johnny is a son of mine and so he's kin to you."
Then Jimmy be fair and Jimmy be fine and wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Jimmy but me father up and said:
"I'm sorry to tell you daughter what your mother never knew,
But Jimmy too is a son of mine, and so he's kin to you."
Then Danny be fair and Danny be fine and wants me for to wed.
And I would marry Danny but me father up and said:
"I'm sorry to tell you daughter what your mother never knew,
But Danny too is a son of mine, and so he's kin to you."
Oh never was there a girl so sad and sorry as I was;
The boys in town are all me kin, and me father is the cause.
If I should thus continue, I shall die a single miss.
I think I'll go to Mother and complain to her of this.
"Oh daughter haven't I taught you to forgive and to forget?
And if your father sowed his oats, still you need not fret.
Your father may be the cause of all the boys in town but still....
He's not the one who sired you, so marry who you will!"
Elder child got it. Younger child did not. After much explaining, younger child did not understand why the girl wasn't related to the boys in town. So eventually, I asked them to name two male and four female characters (we'd already tried with "Dad" and "Mom" and "Other Woman #1" etc.) from books.
They named Harry, Ginny, Seamus, Hermione, Romilda, and Pansy.
We ended up with the following family tree:
Ginny
+ ========= Cindy (narrator)
Harry
+ ========= Johnny (and Ron probably a little miffed at them)
Hermione
(Harry)
+ ========= Jimmy (and a lot of chocolate cauldrons)
Romilda
(Harry)
+ ========= Danny (Harry was doing drugs here)
Pansy
So he was able to see why Harry thought she was related to all these boys.
Then we changed it for the last verse, ending up with
Seamus
+ ========== Cindy (Dean's gonna blow a gasket when he finds out about this)
Ginny
Harry
+ ========= Johnny
Hermione
(Harry)
+ ========= Jimmy
Romilda
(Harry)
+ ========= Danny
Pansy
And he got it!
It was a rather surreal conversation, though. Especially when he wanted to know how people could have children and not know that they had them, or not know that they had been cheated on when their spouse had kids with/by somebody else.
Elder child: Well they have to have sex to have kids.
Younger child: Yeah.
Me: You normally don't do that in public.
Elder child: It's not like Harry goes to Ginny, "OK, see you later, I'm off to have sex with Hermione!" and she says, "No problem, I'll just go have sex with Seamus!"
Me: ::stifles giggles::
